Recognize & appreciate opportunities. Because they’re all opportunities.
What’s most important in my life?
Ever asked yourself this question?
If you have, how have you answered?
Is it fame & fortune?
Success & wealth?
Health & happiness?
Throughout our lives the answer to this question will undoubtedly change many times, mostly due to the changing circumstances in your world.
My answer as an 18 year old would have been way different than my answer would be today (18 wasn’t really that long ago was it?).
Your answer will also change throughout life based on who you are surrounded by.
What if I were to tell you that bosses in your life can have a profound impact on your answer?
Negatively at times unfortunately.
But if you’re really lucky, & hit the boss homerun, you can also have bosses in your life that make profound impacts on you, the people around you, & the way you live. But before you go on you should know that BOTH types of bosses are opportunities for growth & success.
So we’ve all had ‘em…….
Yup. Bad bosses. Bad leaders. Supervisors, managers, team leaders who lead by title only.
Everyone’s definition of a bad boss is different, it really just depends on you, your personality, your characteristics, your agenda, your wants & needs.
But the truth is that at some point we’ve all run into that “boss” who doesn’t lead with love, who doesn’t lead with empathy, who doesn’t lead by example but instead who leads by position, authority, or title. & IMO those are the WORST types of leaders there are – the type of leader who you wouldn’t follow out of a wet paper bag with a hole in it.
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How is it that you are in this position – being led by someone who you have no respect for, who couldn’t lead a thirsty horse to water?
How in the hell did they achieve a leadership position, & more importantly how did you end up being in a position where you are supposed to be led by them?
As inexplicable as this may be, as exasperating as this is (& how much of your time do you waste worrying about this???), you have to realize that there is only so much you can control here.
People rise to the top in a million different ways:
Some earn it through hard work & determination.
Some get lucky.
Some rise to the top because of their honesty, integrity, & moral compass.
Others take the top seat by stabbing others in the back when nobody is watching. Regardless of the scenario that you are in, if you find yourself dealing with a boss, supervisor, manager, or team leader who isn’t a worthy leader then there are ways to make the best of the situation.
Because, just like in the game of life there are always ways to make lemonade outta sour lemons…
For starters you take care of yourself 1st!
If you can’t take care of yourself, then who can you take care of?
Old news here, but still very, very true. Got a schedule so jammed up, so backed up, that you don’t think you’ll ever surface again?
Good. Start tackling it by taking the time & making the effort to take care of yourself 1st.
Go get that workout in; let the sweat & endorphins clear your mind.
Go do that activity that helps you get your mentality right.
Go for that long walk to regain clear-headed consciousness.
Feel better? Good.
Now go tackle those deadlines.
Now scratch your way back to the surface.
Next, take care of those who you are in charge of.
Don’t be consumed with that bad leadership at the top. Consume yourself with those you are responsible for.
In the military you have a bad leader who is your direct report?
Don’t worry about them, worry about your team, your people, your guys.
In sports are you stuck somewhere in the middle?
Are you a Coach who has to report to a lousy boss or General Manager?
Are you a team captain whose Coach is a leader by title only?
Well then stop focusing on the direct report above you, & instead shift your focus to the guys who are dependent on you!
For the Coach that may be the Assistant Coaches, players, support staff.
For the team captain that may be the underclassmen or the rookies.
Whatever the situation, whoever is involved there ARE ways to shift your attention & your focus to what is really important, & that is NOT the poor leadership you happen to have to report to.
You ever gotten lucky???
Ever been lucky enough to have that boss who you couldn’t learn enough from?
Who you felt like a sponge around because you were ALWAYS soaking knowledge, insight, wisdom, & experience in from?
Ever had that boss you had so much respect for it’s hard to put into words?
Ever had a boss that you couldn’t wait to emulate one day?
Well I have, & let me tell you how empowering that feeling is!
Get In Touch With JP
Prior to his time with Kashbox, JP spent 28 years as an NCAA Lacrosse Coach (22 years as a Head Coach). During that span, JP had the opportunity to coach with & against some of the top lacrosse coaches in the country.
When you are lucky enough to find yourself in a position where your boss makes you feel this way you have to take advantage of it.
Hard work, determination, grit, resilience, & drive are all some of the best qualities to have during a professional career.
There are many more as well that can help you chase & attain professional success.
But that boss whose coat tails you can ride for awhile is invaluable.
Invaluable in the experience you can gain.
Invaluable in the knowledge you can learn.
Invaluable in establishing who you want to be & how you want to do it professionally.
For me it happened when I had a boss who was at the absolute top of the profession. How he chose me for his team I’m still not sure. This boss might as well have walked on water as far as I was concerned. He was successful, proven, experienced.
His authority was unquestioned – he walked into the room & the floor was his, period.
He told you to jump, without hesitation you asked “ How high?”
He put his people 1st.
Always.
He was unrelenting in his work ethic, in his professionalism, in his knowledge. Quite simply he was “the man”. But what really, truly set him apart was his unrelenting commitment to his family. As time consuming as his profession was, & as dedicated as he had to be to make it to the top he was even more dedicated to being the best family man I ever had the privilege to be around.
He was a great husband, an incredible father, & he made it very clear to all involved, every day, that this was his #1 priority in life.
Yes, as successful as he was professionally he never wavered on being the absolute best family man you’ll ever see.
This learning experience that I was so lucky to have showed me how invaluable it is to truly value the important things in life. Yes, professional success is very important, & it should be. But when you learn more from a boss about what really, truly matters in life than you do about your profession you’ve hit the jackpot.
You’ve just gotten lucky. Very lucky!
It was a lesson that I’ve always held with me; while you can achieve all the successes in the professional world, while you can rise to the top of your profession it’s what happens away from your profession that really matters.
Are you being the best son or daughter you can be today?
Are you being the best brother or sister?
The roles go on & on, but the lessons learned from a great boss are invaluable in the professional world.
If you’re really lucky the lessons learned from a great boss will change the way you live your life.
Meaningful impacts
So now that we’ve talked about the differences a good boss & a bad boss can make in your world, let’s talk about where we go from here: When faced with the challenge of bad leadership, a bad boss or direct report, let’s shift our focus.
Shift that focus away from the negativity “above” you, & instead put your attention, detail, & care towards those who you are in charge of.
If there is nobody professionally who you oversee, then there is always yourself. Taking care of yourself should always take priority!
On the other hand, when you have the opportunity to work for a boss or leader who you truly believe in then be sure to soak all of the wisdom, knowledge, experience, & characteristics in. Learn as much as possible, & be sure to envision yourself emulating this mentor as you move forward in your career.
Finally, if you get so lucky to have a transcendent boss who teaches you way more important lessons than just in the workplace then consider yourself lucky (& be sure to truly appreciate the opportunity).
Either way, enjoy the ride!
Along with his responsibilities as an NCAA Coach, JP has also been a small-business owner for the past 22 years. He founded & built a successful lacrosse camp business that, in addition to camps, expanded into travel teams, clinics, lessons, & consultations.
In both of his careers as an NCAA Coach & small-business owner, JP has helped to teach, coach, mentor, & develop hundreds of players & coaches.
